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Monday, December 7, 2015

Hearts Broken and Lessons Learned

Hello everyone!

This week has been awesome, definitely learned a lot this week.
Christmas is just around the corner and I am so excited! Well here's
what I learned this week on the mission, it's something that I'll
never forget.

I never realized how much heartache you could feel while on your
mission. This past weekend has been an emotional roller coaster for my
heart. On Saturday, we went to go and teach Camilo's kids Anna and
Antonio. Two weeks ago, they were ready and excited for their baptism
on the 12th of December, but when we met with them on Saturday, you
could tell that the adversary had gotten a hold of their hearts. They
told us that they didn't feel ready for baptism and that they weren't
sure if they wanted this anymore. My heart broke. It was a deep
heartache. One that I have never felt before. I think the thing that
really broke my heart the most was watching Camilo's reaction to this.
Camilo wants his kids to find the same happiness he has so badly, and
to watch him during the whole lesson was unbearable. We set new
baptismal dates for them in January, but the adversary is working so
hard on them! After the lesson, I felt so sad and frustrated. Like
maybe it was my fault because I didn't teach them well enough, or I
could have done something more for them. I quickly tried to get back
to work to take my mind off of it, but the heartache was still there.
Later in the evening, we had our Ward Christmas party. The Fifita
family was suppose to come(our family we are teaching right now!), but
as the night went on, they never showed. Once again, I felt so sad. I
was so excited for them to come and see people in the Ward and make
friendships! It had been a rough day already and this just didn't make
it better. As we were leaving the Ward party a member asked us how our
day had been. We replied the normal "good" but the member could tell
that it hadn't been a good day. She went on to ask us why we were
feeling down. We went on to tell her that the family didn't show up to
the party. What the member said to us next is something I'll never
forget. She told me that what I'm getting upset about is people's
agency, one of gods gifts to His children. She told me that I've done
my part, which is to teach and invite, but it's up to them to choose
to act. She told me that as long as I do my part, Heavenly Father will
take care of the rest on His time. What this member said to me was
exactly what I needed to hear. I was truly humbled by what she said to
us.

The next day,at church, the Fifita family was no where to be seen.
More sadness crept into my heart. During testimony meeting, many
testimonies were born about learning to rely on God and trust His
timing. Another tender mercy for me and a reminder to me of who is
really in charge. I have come to learn that I can't do all of this by
myself. I like to think I'm strong and can handle everything on my
own, but truly I can't. And this experience reminded me of that. God
is the one that is going to send the spirit to testify to our
investigators of the truthfulness of our message. I've learned that it
requires patience to wait for gods timing but that it is always worth
it and always the better way. I came to terms with everything that has
happened the past couple of days and immediately the sadness I felt
was gone.

I was enjoying the rest of church when 10 minutes before church is
done, the Fifita family shows up!! I was so overwhelmed with joy when
I saw them! A complete opposite from the way I was feeling in the
previous day! They each went to their classes for the last 10 minutes!
We went to young women's with the 16 year old daughter, Fusi. And she
LOVED it! Fusi was the only one out of the family that was hesitant
about baptism and coming to church, but after church today(the 10
minutes of it) she said she wanted to be baptized and that she was
come to mutual on Wednesday and church next week! What a miracle!

This weekend has truly been a humbling, learning experience for me. I
am grateful for the things that have happened this weekend. There's a
quote from an Ensign article called "The Quest for Joy" that I feel
really summarizes this weekend, "We may not feel deeply enough to know
joy unless our hearts have been hollowed out by sorrow." How grateful
I am for the sorrows in life that allow the joys to be so much more
joyful!

A mission is hard, but Alma 28:8 says why it's worth it. "And this is
the account of [Sister Thompson] and her [companion], their
journeyings in the land of [California], their sufferings in the land,
their sorrows, and their afflictions, and their incomprehensible joy."

I have never felt so much sorrow than on my mission, but the
"incomprehensible joy" I have felt, makes it all worth it.


Love always, Sister Thompson 🌻
The hermanas and us!
Some of the Fifita kids!
Ward Christmas party

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